7 Pointers For Tattoo Hopefuls

1. Thinkin about it first
like really, really think about it. this is for life, mate. you know not what lies ahead. what seems perfect now can change tomorrow. think the nazi soldier with a swastika on his chest and then findin out he was of jewish descent. the most common blooper i think is tattooin somethin regardin your current romantic relationship. johnny depp had "winona forever" when he was still tight with ms. ryder but when it was over he had it altered to a very questionable "wino forever". eminem had some "Kim R.I.P" thing on his arm for years and then i heard on the radio the sellout took the bitch back in and had it removed. my favourite senseless blonde (beatin marilyn monroe narrowly), pamela anderson, had "tommy" on her ring finger but changed it to "mommy" after he beat her like paul gascoigne on ecstacy. i could go on forever.

so unless you are an obscenely rich celebrity, you would not be able to afford it. some young upstart from KL i heard had a dragon done chan-ho-nam style, and his conservative oriental dad paid a fortune to have it removed and never spoke to the son again. the closest test i can think of for establishin your certainty is to ask yourself "how much can my life change to make me not want this tattoo?". and even so, you will can never be sure. i took three years to really think about the first tattoo i had and i'm glad i did.

2.Pickin a design
in a way, this would tie in with the first advice. if you were fairly certain of your chosen design/text/image already then you would have been fairly certain of wantin a tattoo. only fools would decide to have a tattoo and then walk into a shop and pick a design off the shelf. either that or hedonistic scallies who live from hand to mouth. angelina jolie's latin maxim "quod me nutrit me destruit" (what nourishes me also destroys me) on her abdomen seems well thought considerin her wayward ways. however i have always wondered whether people like jon bon jovi regret the silly superman logo on his arm. as green day frontman billy joe armstrong once said "the man is a walkin loser and he thinks he's superman". i have nothin nice to say about the nazi-lookin thing on beckham's back either. nor the demonic canvas of skin borne by the undertaker (wwf fame), marilyn manson, fred durst and also the various metal rock stars of today.

3. Pickin a spot
if you got past the earlier two, you should pick a spot. usually, it is when pickin a spot that you start questionin advice#1 again. the obvious concerns are your career opportunities. society has not evolved to accept an allen iverson look-alike to be your surgeon at the OR. there's a pretty damn good reason most people are not aware of regardin gangsters' tattoos -they are testament to the bearer's exclusion from mainstream society. a brother with "love" and "hate" tattooed on his knuckles is not goin to be a man who advises you on your mortgages in a bank. a grizzly giant with "anarchy" on his forehead does not work as an accountant in the day. goin further, you should also bear in mind that hidden tattoos don't mean they stay hidden all the time. imagine findin out about an overlooked "monica always" tattoo on your fiance's butt on the eve of your weddin. and your name is emily.

another pointer would be; remember your body changes. skin streches or contracts over time. havin a tattooed text on your belly (e.g. tommy lee's infamous "mayhem") may prove unreadable in the next 10 years. images and designs distort over time and you should always pick a spot which you do not foresee much change happenin to.

4.Pickin a good tattooist
unless you are the hardcore perfectionist/sadist/naturalist who would travel to the depths of the rainforest to find the aboriginal bamboo-wieldin inkmaster, commercialism dictates you will have yours done in a mall, shop et cetera. establishment helps -if a place has been there for a while, it's a fair indication that it hasn't killed anyone or done somethin horribly wrong. mike tyson's tattoos of che guevara and mao zedong look like che guevara and mao zedong instead of rasputin and patrick teoh because he had a good tattoo artist.

however be wary of young apprentices who work within established businesses. this is why the charge differs from artist to artist. while most now have certificates, many have a portfolio of their work to alleviate your anxieties. this is a mark of a made man so to speak. a good tattoo artist will always make sure you are game from the start. they will not take money knowin you are just another rash youth who would come back cryin the next week. i have known of a tattoo artist who refused to tattoo a poem on this dude's back because it was about someone who died due to his alleged own fault. the artist said he would regret it later. these are the men you should choose.

5. Don't imbibe alcohol or smoke recreational drugs prior to
the artist will tell you this and make you sign stacks of disclaimers. lowerin your blood pressure is not good for the session because you might faint. if you have a history of havin low tolerance to pain, let your tattooist know about it. in my personal experience, i was told that in the last 30minutes of my three hour odd session, i was showin signs of delusion and dementia. he was preparin the pills already but thankfully i did not get worse. also if you are a heavy drinker, let the man know. people who are known to be with the pint may bleed excessively.

6. Maintainin your tattoo
scabbin is a natural part of the healin process. do not mess with it. you will get discolouration/distortion/infection. ignore the itch. be careful when havin sex if your woman is a known tiger. also, if you're in a tropical country, do not expose the tattoo under direct sunlight for three months. if you're in scotland then you have nothin to worry. haha.

7. Think about it again
do you really want this? if you are not a sailor, tattoo artist or gangster, you really must think hard about it. the worst thing is not when people come to disapprove of it, but when you yourself wake up one mornin and take a glance in the mirror and think "fuck me that's ugly, what was i thinkin?".

remember -this is for life, mate!

ciao.
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Word Of The Wolf today is complement \KOM-pluh-muhnt\,

noun:
1. Something that fills up or completes.
2. The quantity or number required to make up a whole or to make something complete.
3. One of two parts that complete a whole or mutually complete each other; a counterpart.

transitive verb:
To supply what is lacking; to serve as a complement to; to supplement.

"Motley Crue's Tommy Lee has tattoos which more than complement his stage image and it seems that bad boys such as himself land all the pretty blondes like Ms. Anderson."

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Complement is from Latin complementum, from complere, "to fill up," from com- (intensive prefix) + plere, "to fill."
Usage note: Complement and compliment ("an expression of admiration or praise") are sometimes confused because they are pronounced the same. A good way to remember which is which is to make a connection between the spelling of complement and complete.